


so no one told you life was gonna be this way?

by ohmykhr (cheribell)



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: Bel is a parent and Varia are his babysitters, Cute, Domestic, Family Fluff, Fluff, Gen, Get ready for family fluff without plot, Humor, This world needs more dad!Bel, Varia - Freeform, single parent
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:41:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 18,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26254339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cheribell/pseuds/ohmykhr
Summary: They all peer down in the bassinet where a baby is tucked in with a pink blanket, staring right back at them with her wide, steel blue eyes.‘’I mean, she could be anyone’s,’’ Bel says, tilting his head to the side with his hands resting on his hips.The rest of Varia turn to look at the prince, unsure whether he is kidding or not.‘’She is blonde like you, trash.’’‘’She has your cool and royal eyes too, Bel.’’Fran lifts the baby’s shirt just enough to peek at her stomach and the baby giggles at the contact. ‘’She has the same weird birthmark as you do, Senpai. I think you’re the lucky winner.’’OR the one where Bel becomes a single parent and Varia helps him navigate through parenthood.
Comments: 10
Kudos: 131





	1. Unexpected

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AllThingsVaria](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllThingsVaria/gifts).



They all peer down in the bassinet where a baby is tucked in with a pink blanket, staring right back at them with her wide, steel blue eyes. 

‘’I mean, she could be anyone’s,’’ Bel says, tilting his head to the side with his hands resting on his hips.

The rest of Varia turn to look at the prince, unsure whether he is kidding or not.

‘’She is blonde like you, trash.’’

‘’She has your cool and royal eyes too, Bel.’’

Fran lifts the baby’s shirt just enough to peek at her stomach and the baby giggles at the contact. ‘’She has the same weird birthmark as you do, Senpai. I think you’re the lucky winner.’’

Cold sweat runs down his neck, and his throat is dry – despite being outside, surrounded by fresh air, the prince feels as if all the oxygen has been stolen from him.

The baby can’t be his. He is no parent material, he has no idea how to take care of a baby – hell, Bel doesn’t even know whether he likes babies or not. 

The possibility of the baby being his is there, however - around nine months ago, he was having a bit too much fun with several different people. Bel doesn’t remember their faces nor their names, so he can’t track down the mother of his child. And even if he could, it wouldn’t get him anywhere. A mother wouldn’t abandon her child at someone’s doorsteps if she wanted to keep the baby.

Of course, there was always the possibility that it was Bel and his reputation the mother didn't want to deal with. Being linked to a crown prince  _ and  _ an assassin working for a mafia organization came with a big target on one's back. Anyone sane would tap out of that fate if possible.

Bel glances towards the little bundle of joy. He won’t believe the child is his until someone with a medical degree confirms it

  
  


‘’Congratulations, the baby is yours.’’ The doctor states dryly, looking through the test results she had printed out before handing them over to Bel. ‘’She is a healthy baby, too. Around seven weeks old. I’ll be back with all the documents you need in a few minutes, please stay seated.’’

Before leaving the room, the doctor changes the baby’s diaper and buttons up her onesie, handing her over to Bel, who reluctantly takes the infant in his arms. The door shuts close behind the doctor, but Bel doesn’t move an inch; he is frozen on the spot with his daughter nuzzled in his arms.

Bel stares at the wall in front of him, his soul leaving his body with each passing second, heart rummaging against his chest as panic threatens to rise inside him. 

He is a dad, a parent. Responsible for another human being. 

Was he even cut out for being a parent? Everybody knows his job isn’t exactly ideal for someone with a young child and he has never even considered having a child of his own. Would she be better off in someone else’s care instead?

A demanding wail comes from the baby and Bel snaps back to reality. He glances down at his daughter, the same pair of blue eyes staring right back at him, teary and pleading, as if she sensed his doubts and thoughts about abandoning her. And that’s when Bel realizes that whatever he does, giving her for someone else to raise is  _ not  _ an option.

She shares his royal bloodline; she is a part of him whether he wanted it or not.

Bel gives her a pacifier and props her on his shoulder and bounces her slightly. The baby is still crying and frankly, Bel has never felt so lost in his entire life. He tries to calm her down, but bouncing the baby isn’t cutting it.

‘’Shh, I’m trying my best here, princess,’’ Bel shushes, rubbing her back in circular motions. It seems to work. Her wailing turns into upset hiccups but it’s enough for Bel to gain some confidence and feel less like a failure.

The baby clings onto him as she calms down while Bel whispers comforting sweet nothings to her, bouncing her slightly as he paces around the room. In a way, Bel is also clinging onto her, unable to even consider letting her go now. All the panic and worry from earlier has transformed into a sense of purpose and a need to protect the child.

His parents had never been there for him, never supported him nor gave him love. All attention from them had to be earned, usually by one-upping his twin brother in something. Their love was entirely conditional. He and Rasiel were just props used as the King and Queen pleased. He doesn’t look back to his childhood with fondness.

‘’We’ll get through this together, somehow,’’ Bel murmurs and places her in the bassinet when she calms down enough for him to dare to move her. He reaches to tuck her in better under her blanket, afraid she might catch a cold even though it’s late July. His eyes scan the girl – his daughter – and one thing is crystal clear to him; he won’t let her childhood be miserable or filled with memories of an unloving parent. He will do everything in his power to be the parent that his parents failed to be to him.

No matter what.

* * *

After the initial shock of one of them being a parent, Lussuria had rushed to the nearby store to buy the absolute essentials for the baby - infant formula, diapers, a pacifier, and a bottle. What he had bought lasted exactly three days until it was time to visit the store again, this time with Bel.

"What does an infant even  _ need _ ?" Bel whines, leaning against the shopping cart while browsing through the baby aisle. 

"More diapers, for sure." Lussuria hums, throwing several packages in the cart with a full shelf of wet wipes.

Bel makes a disgusted face. "I'm not going to change any diapers, that's a job for a peasant not for a prince."

Lussuria rolls his eyes - this much is expected from the snobby prince. He looks down at the handwritten list they made. "She also needs another pacifier, milk bottles, toys…."

In all honestly, Bel is glad to have Lussuria there. God knows he wouldn’t have had any idea what the correct diaper size is or what type of formula to get. Bel purses his lips slightly - the doctor should’ve given him a parenting guide or something, after getting something major like this thrown in his face.

While Lussuria is stacking essentials in the cart, Bel is looking around for anything that catches his eyes. His eyes light up as soon as the prince sees the softest looking blanket neatly folded in one of the shelves. Bel picks up a white blanket with a light pink crown pattern all over it. A wide smile spreads on his face.

"I'm getting her this."

"Bel, she has a blanket already."

"It's not fit for a princess, I like this one."

Lussuria lets him have his way - it's no use starting to argue over a blanket. They still have a lot more to buy and Lussuria needs all of his energy for the shopping spree.

They pick out several other necessary items (along with a few unnecessary ones, mostly because of Bel) and head towards the clothing stores.

"What sizes are we looking for?" Lussuria asks. 

Bel is already stacking several tiny dresses in the shopping basket.

"I don't know," He replies, throwing a few pairs of shoes in to accompany the dresses. "The tiny size?"

"We should get three different sizes of each, then," Lussuria says, ‘’You might want to pick some rompers, those are easy to put on.’’

Bel nods in agreement. 

Fashion and shopping are something Bel and Lussuria have always bonded over ever since the prince had joined Varia. Now, looking at Lussuria comparing two different pajamas before throwing them both in the cart makes something bubble in his chest. As if they had come a full circle, shopping clothes for Bel’s daughter. 

‘’We have all the clothes she needs now, but shouldn’t we get something warmer for her as well?’’ Lussuria wonders out loud, tapping a perfectly manicured finger against his chin. ‘’It’ll get colder before we know it. We don’t want autumn to surprise us, right?’’

‘’Better to get everything we can at once,’’ Bel says, ‘’The prince is busy.’’ 

They end up spending a fortune on the baby but as they leave the store, Bel seems pleased with the haul and excited to bury his daughter in luxurious toys and high fashion dresses. 

  
  


When they come back from shopping, the baby is cradled in Fran’s arms. Mammon is sitting on the floor in front of Fran, calculating something with their phone. Possibly the extra expenses the baby was going to cost them.

"What is she wearing?" Bel asks, bags dropping on the floor as he strides towards the two. Instead of the pink onesie she was wearing earlier, his daughter was now wearing something dark and familiar.

Fran lifts the baby towards her papa. "Mammon's uniform," he says, "her previous clothes got covered in shit and this is the only thing that fits her."

Bel lets out his trademark laugh, reaching for his phone to take a picture before scooping her up in his arms. This is a sight he wouldn't see anytime soon. 

"Oh right," Fran says, picking dirt out under his fingernails, "Boss wants to see you. Says it’s urgent."

Bel adjusts the girl's position in his arms, Lussuria's advice to support her head ringing loud and clear in his mind. 

"Empty the bags while I'm gone." He demands, striding towards the kitchen to grab the baby's milk before he heads to Xanxus' office.

Xanxus is sitting by his office table, legs thrown on the wooden surface as he browses a stack of papers. He motions for Bel to come in without bearing a glance to the prince.

"What's up, Boss?"

Xanxus slides two papers towards him. "Read these through. You up for the mission?"

Before Bel can read the first sentence, the baby starts to bawl her eyes out - she is hungry, and much like her father, she is  _ not  _ patient when it comes to food. 

Bel curses under his breath and shoves the baby in Xanxus' arms putting the bottle in her mouth. 

Xanxus looks alarmed as the baby starts gulping down her milk happily and Bel laughs at his internal panic. He had felt the same way when he held his daughter for the first time - panic, quickly followed by adoration.

"Just hold her like that while I go through these."

Xanxus has never in his life held a baby before, let alone fed one. He stares at the little creature in his arms, icy blue eyes meeting his red ones as she empties the bottle. The boss of Varia isn’t a religious man but at that moment he prays for every God and deity that the baby doesn’t start crying while in his arms. 

When the baby is finished, he puts the empty milk bottle on the table, unsure what he is supposed to do next. Bel seems to have noticed as he advises Xanxus to burp her, not bothering to tear his gaze from the papers in his hands.

Xanxus copies what he has seen Bel do before, tapping her back with his hand. It’s possibly the most gentle he has been with another person in a long time, he realizes. He doesn't react when she burps milk on his shoulder, only wipes her face carefully before cradling her in his arms.

Bel is still focused on reading the details of his upcoming mission and Xanxus doesn’t bother him. Instead, he grabs the toy the baby had dropped on his table earlier and wiggles it in front of her, unsure how to entertain an infant.

The baby giggles and swats the toy playfully. A tender smile tugs the corners of his mouth - the kid has spunk. They play like that until the baby tires and wraps her tiny fist around his index finger as she starts to drift back asleep.

Something stirs in the man’s chest as he watches the defenseless baby in his arms and Xanxus recognizes the feeling immediately. The urge to protect her stirs inside him, loud and present. He knows, right there and then, that he would kill a man for the sake of this child if he had to.

‘’She fell asleep?’’ Bel curses something under his breath and folds the papers messily to fit into his uniform pockets. ‘’Hope you’re not too busy, she is a light sleeper so I can’t move her until she wakes up.’’

‘’Bel, the mission?’’ Xanxus grunts, ignoring the prince entirely.

‘’I’ll do it.’’ Bel rubs his neck, a habit of his whenever something bothers him.

‘’But?’’

‘’I’ll be gone for one night and two days. She’ll need a babysitter.’’

‘’So? One of the maids can do it.’’

Bel shakes his head, stubborn as ever. ‘’Has to be someone I trust.’’

‘’Fine, the rest of the scum will take turns.’’

This seems to please the prince and he relaxes visibly. It’s kind of sweet, Xanxus muses, that the prince trash doesn’t let just anyone watch over his daughter.

‘’Levi isn’t allowed to even breathe in her presence, though. Who knows what germs that thing carries.’’

* * *

Bel is sitting on the common room sofa, holding the infant close to his chest while watching TV on low volume. The whole night Bel had tried to get her to fall asleep in her crib but as soon as he placed her in it, the baby started crying. Eventually, Bel had given up with the crib and came downstairs to kill some time while his daughter slept blissfully on his chest.

Bel rubs his eyes, careful not to wake the baby with his movements and yawns. Couldn’t she pick a better night to be menace instead of keeping him up right before a mission? He is about to drift to sleep himself when Fran enters the room and takes a seat next to Bel on the sofa.

‘’If you wake the baby, I’ll kill you.’’

"You know, Senpai," Fran whispers, "you have to give her a name soon. What if she ends up thinking her name is baby?"

"I know." Bel hisses, rubbing his daughter’s back gently. "It's not that simple."

Fran hums and changes the channel to which Bel responds with a glare. 

"I'm sure it's very challenging for a fake prince." He says, "Just name her Susan, problem solved. You’re welcome."

"I'm not fucking naming her Susan. She has to have a name fit for royalty."

Fran shrugs and turns his gaze to the TV. 

"Does it matter? You're not a real prince anyway."

If he didn't have his daughter nuzzled up against his chest, he would've chucked his knives at the illusionist. Bel bet his money that Fran was aware of this.

A comfortable silence falls between the two assassins as a mediocre action movie plays on the screen. Bel didn’t know why exactly Fran was still up and about, but he appreciated the company nevertheless. 

‘’Astra,’’ Bel whispers to no one in particular, but it’s enough for Fran to whip his head towards the older man. ‘’I think I’ll name her Astra.’’

Fran opens his mouth but Astra is quicker, interrupting him with her crying, demanding food. He rushes to the kitchen to prepare the bottle before her wailing manages to wake up the rest of the house as well.

"I don’t think she is a fan of her name, Senpai," Fran comments from the kitchen as Bel tries to grab her attention by waving the baby's favorite frog toy in front of her. 

‘’Shut your mouth and bring her the bottle, toad.’’

Fran ignores the royalty and gives the baby her bottle. As soon as the nub is in her mouth, she falls silent and gulps down the milk, hand reaching up to grab onto Bel's.

"You have the appetite of your papa, little Susie," Fran coos at the baby in his monotone voice, taking his previous seat on the couch. 

‘’I told you, she’s Astra, not Susie and definitely not Susan.’’ Bel’s eye twitches - the illusionist was pissing him off on purpose, knowing he couldn’t react with Astra in his arms.

Astra, much like her papa, was a greedy and quick eater - in no time the milk bottle was empty. Bel looks at his daughter and judging from her already drooping eyes, she was about to fall asleep any minute now. This was his chance to place her in her crib. 

He doesn't bother to say goodnight to Fran as he rushes upstairs to his room where her crib is stuffed in until the preparations for her room are done. 

Mink, who had been asleep in her bed, moves out of the way as soon as Bel places the baby down. The box animal trails around Astra, the fluffy white tail tickling her jaw as he passes, settling down to sleep at her feet.

Bel smiles fondly, scratching behind Mink's ear as he gives Astra her pacifier and rubs her back until she falls back asleep. 

Mink watches her, ears perked up and ready to react if she was to make any noise. In the short time the baby had been with them, Mink had created a bit of a protective streak towards the new addition to the family. He would spend the nights in her crib even when Bel tried to get him to sleep in his expensive bed and showed his teeth to the servants and maids if Bel or other guardians weren’t in the room with his daughter.

Mink had never been one to accept many people in his pack but Bel was more than happy to see his companion accepting his daughter as his own in such a short time. 

Bel glances at the time from his phone and groans; it was about time for him to head towards the airport for his mission. He grabs his box weapon and Varia coat, leaning over to take one last glance of his daughter who was sleeping soundly in her crib.

‘’Papa will be right back,’’ he promises, voice barely louder than a whisper. He turns on the baby monitor and takes it to Squalo’s room, as they had agreed earlier the day. 

Now it was up to Varia to look after her for the next two days and all Bel could do was to have faith they succeed.


	2. Babysitting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The second chapter is here, this time with Varia as babysitters! I hope you have as much fun reading this chapter as I had writing it. Comments and kudos are always appreciated and motivate me to write more, so let me know how you like the chapter! Thank you so much for reading.

_ "Warm the milk in the microwave for a minute and test if it's hot," _ Squalo reads out loud from a piece of paper Bel left them before his mission. The swordsman looks at the bottle in his hand, then back at the note. "How the fuck do I test it?!"

Astra cries from her bouncer impatiently, waiting for the man to bring her breakfast. Squalo curses quietly and goes with the first idea crossing his mind; sipping from the bottle. It’s not  _ that _ different from the milk he drinks, but something about the baby’s food makes him feel icky after tasting it. The liquid doesn't burn his tongue, however, so he deems it safe for the baby and brings it over to her.

‘’I thought my babysitting days were over when that blonde runt became an adult,’’ Squalo complains as he watches Astra devour her milk, big blue eyes blinking innocently at the assassin. With her thick lashes and unruly blonde hair, she reminds him of a classic description of an angel. But if she was anything like her father, she would be the farthest thing from an angel. 

For some reason, Squalo believes that to be the case.

‘’Oh! She’s up early,’’ Lussuria walks to the room with Levi behind him. The sun guardian strides in with his black fur-trimmed sating robe following his every movement. Why he has to be so dramatic early in the morning, Squalo can’t tell. Levi, on the other hand, is the polar opposite in his Varia uniform, ready to run some errands for Xanxus. 

Lussuria pats Astra’s head gently as he passes, the fur tickling her nose as it brushes against her face. He squats next to Squalo and they stare at the baby in silence while Astra empties her bottle, her blue eyes fixated on the swordsman.

Squalo opens his mouth to speak, but his words get cut off as the baby grabs a fistful of his hair and pulls with all her strength - it’s not a lot but enough to make the swordsman yelp out in pain. Despite common belief, his scalp is  _ sensitive _ .

‘’You bitch, let go of my hair!’’ 

Levi lets out an ugly snort, laughing at Squalo’s misery as Astra’s grip only tightens around the silver locks. Squalo yells louder and Levi falls on the ground, clutching onto his stomach as he tries to calm his laughter.

Lussuria smacks Squalo across the head as if his head isn’t suffering enough already. ‘’She is a sweet little angel, do not call her a bitch!’’

‘’How can her grip be this tight?’’ Squalo yells and tries to yank his hair out of her tiny fist without killing his scalp. It turns out to be more difficult than he could’ve imagined.‘’Levi, don’t just fucking stand there, do something!’’

‘’Maybe we should cut the hair?’’ Levi snickers, ‘’That way she’d let go.’’

‘’Fuck off, both of you are fucking useless,’’ Squalo yanks his hair away from Astra’s reach which causes her to throw a fit, crying hard enough for her face to turn red as a beet. For such a tiny creature, she sure is noisy. 

Levi is still chuckling as he leaves just in time to escape Astra’s wails.

Lussuria picks her up from the bouncer and tries to calm her down with a sweet tone that makes Squalo sick in his stomach. 

‘’Are you happy now? You’ve upset her!’’ Lussuria scolds.

‘’She can’t even understand me,’’ Squalo argues, ‘’I doubt she’s even upset about that, I’m sure she is as bratty as that fucking prince trash and is pissed off I didn’t let her play with my hair.’’

Astra’s crying only gets louder at the statement. Squalo rolls his eyes, shoving a pacifier in the kid’s mouth to silence her. Her teary eyes stare at him accusingly and Squalo feels just a little bit sorry for calling her names. Just a bit.

‘’Maybe she’s fussy because she has been inside this whole time?’’ Lussuria wonders out loud and turns to Squalo. ‘’Should we take her out on a stroll? Is that something babies enjoy?’’

‘’How the fuck would I know?’’ Squalo says, ‘’And what do you mean ‘we’? I’m not fucking playing house with you, I have work to do.’’

Ignoring the swordsman, Lussuria rushes upstairs to dress Astra (and himself) properly for their morning stroll, not caring about Squalo’s complaints as the man follows his trail. Squalo packs a small emergency bag with diapers, a Gucci sweater for babies, a milk bottle, and her pink crown blankie while Lussuria changes her diaper and gets her ready to go.

By the time they get out of the headquarters, Astra has stopped crying and is fast asleep in the baby carriage which Lussuria is pushing towards a trail that Squalo knows to lead to a park nearby.

Morning walks are a luxury that Squalo has forgotten about. Most mornings he is too busy to even finish a cup of coffee, let alone take a walk. He forgot how much he enjoys having the soothing company of the nature around him. Now, with Bel gone on a mission and having no one at the castle to yell at for lagging paperwork, Squalo has a second chance to enjoy the rare moment of serenity.

That is, until he is reminded he isn't alone 

"Aren't you so glad you came with us?" Lussuria asks with a smile too bright for an early morning. He wraps his arm around Squalo’s, pulling the man closer. 

Squalo scoffs but doesn’t bother trying to pull away. He knows which fights are worth picking and which are ones he has already lost before they even begin - this happens to belong in the latter category. 

"You fucking wish, trash,’’ Squalo replies, ‘’Where are we even going?"

They walked out of Varia's grounds some time ago. They weren't too far from home but definitely closer to running into other people. Squalo wasn't too thrilled about the idea.

"To the park, of course," Lussuria says, "Kids love parks!"

Squalo glances at the baby, wondering whether Astra was big enough to play in the park. How old does a kid even have to be to use the swings or slide? Doubt plants seeds in his guts at the thought of putting Astra in a baby swing - if she isn’t old enough to support her neck yet then she probably isn’t old enough for swings either. 

And if anything was to happen to her, Bel would fly across the country to personally assassinate them.

‘’Let’s skip the park,’’ Squalo decides. He grabs the stroller and makes a swift U-turn with it so that they are headed towards the headquarters again. ‘’Shouldn’t her first park experience be with Bel and not us?’’

Lussuria gasps and Squalo  _ knows  _ the sun guardian was about to get unnecessarily sentimental about his intentions. He lets it slide - better have Lussuria think he is sentimental enough to think about father-daughter quality time than have him argue with Squalo.

’’You’re so thoughtful!’’ Lussuria squeals, waking Astra. Squalo considers jumping off from the wooden bridge they are walking on when the first wails hit his eardrums.

‘’And you are so fucking dead if you can’t shut her up,’’ Squalo promises.

* * *

Levi had never been one to get along with children, let alone with babies. Something about him made them tremble and cry. Fran always claims it was ‘his ugly mug’ as the illusionist kindly puts it, but Levi doesn’t agree with him. There was nothing wrong with his face. He just didn’t get along with kids. 

This is why when Lussuria and Squalo leave Astra with him for a couple of hours so they could get some work done, Levi was righteously terrified. This is Bel’s baby in question - if he manages to break the child somehow, Bel will have his head on a spike by the time he returns. Not that he was afraid of the prince. He simply values his life. 

Astra was lying in the bouncer where Lussuria left her. Levi didn’t dare to move her. If he could help it, the baby won’t be moved until the other guardians come to get her. So, there she was, staring right into his soul with those ice-blue eyes of hers. They were wide with wonder as she studied Levi, blinking slowly every once in a while. 

Just like her papa, Astra got bored soon enough. She resorts to staring at the colorful stars and frogs that Fran hung above the bouncer earlier that week. She seems to like them - if she was older and able to carry her body better, Astra would’ve tried to reach for the stars or grab her tiny fist around the frog toy. 

But for now, she had to settle for just looking. 

‘’I don’t know what you want to do,’’ Levi reaches for the remote and shuffles through the channels until he finds the right one. ‘’But I want to watch this documentary, so either watch it with me or keep quiet. Okay?’’

Astra makes a sound as if to agree with him. 

Levi smiles to himself - maybe he wasn’t too shabby with kids after all?

Turns out Levi got confident too quickly. One moment he is watching a document with Astra in the common room and the next thing he knows, he wakes up in the same spot an hour later but the baby is  _ gone _ . 

Poof, gone.

Just like that.

The bouncer she lied in is empty and the only suggestion she ever was there, was her blankie, now trampled on the floor, forgotten. Levi lifts the blanket and brings it close to his chest as he frantically begins to search the room. 

She isn’t old enough to move on her own so surely she couldn’t be  _ that _ far?

Levi checks everywhere - under the table, behind the couch but finds nothing else but some of Bel’s knives and candy wrappers. If he wasn’t so upset about Astra’s disappearance, he would’ve been disgusted at the mess behind the couch.

‘’Is this how I die?’’ Levi mumbles to himself, pacing around the room, ‘’Bel is gonna kill me. Even if I run and hide now, he will find me and he will gut me.’’

‘’That sounds lovely, but why would Senpai kill you?’’

Levi whips his head to look at Fran, who picks his nose in disinterest, flicking whatever he found there on the ground. Levi scrunches up his nose - he lives with pigs. 

Despite his disgust, Levi strides across the room, grabs the smaller guardian by the shoulders, and shakes him.

‘’Fran, you have to help me,’’ he pleads.

‘’No. Get off.’’

‘’I messed up big time.’’

‘’I don’t give a rats ass,’’ Fran argues, slapping the man’s hands off his shoulders. Levi takes a step back and lets out a deep sigh.

‘’I lost the baby,’’ he confesses.

Fran stares at him for what feels like eternity, not blinking even once. Levi isn’t sure whether Fran is surprised, mad, or finds the situation absolutely hilarious as his face doesn’t give away anything. 

The silence stretches while Levi’s anxiety rises.

‘’Better start writing a will before Senpai comes back,’’ Fran says. 

Levi reaches to grab him by the neck to strangle him. No one would notice if one illusionist went missing, they have Mammon after all. But Fran anticipates the attack and easily dodges him, causing Levi to stumble on his feet and fall on the ground.

‘’How can you be stupid enough to lose a baby that can’t even crawl yet?’’ Fran wonders.

‘’I don’t know!’’ Levi says, not bothering to get up. The ground can swallow him whole for all he cares. ‘’She was there when I fell asleep but when I woke up she was gone!’’

Fran hums and stares at the empty bouncer. ‘’What if someone kidnapped her? What if one of Senpai’s deranged relatives broke in and took her? What if —’’

‘’You’re not helping!’’ Levi grabs one of Astra’s toys on the floor and throws it at Fran. Again, the illusionist dodges.

‘’Well, it’s not really my problem now is it?’’ Fran says, stretching lazily, ‘’I mean  _ you’re _ the one who lost her.’’

‘’Actually…’’ Levi rubs his chin. ‘’Bel left her to  _ us _ , so we’re  _ all  _ responsible for the baby. Do you think he cares  _ who _ lost her?’’

Fran furrows his brow barely enough for anyone to notice the slight change in his expression. He was done cleaning up the messes others made, but Levi was right; if Bel found out his daughter had gone missing on their watch, he wouldn’t let anyone get away with it.

‘’I hope you fall down the stairs and break your neck,’’ Fran says and kicks the toy at Levi. 

They have a baby to find.

After searching for Astra over an hour, Fran starts to believe the fairies took her to their world. He and Levi looked everywhere - the kitchen, the training room, they even went as far as to look through Lussuria’s room which left both men slightly traumatized. 

They went through all this trouble, but couldn’t find the baby.

The two assassins were back to where they started, both slumped on the couch and staring at the ceiling with lifeless eyes. Neither of them moves, even when the rest of the Varia walk in, except for Xanxus. 

‘’What’re you two slumping about?’’ Squalo asks.

‘’Just thinking,’’ Levi says.

‘’About?’’

‘’Death.’’

Mammon floats up to Fran and pokes the illusionist to get his attention. Fran lifts his head. ‘’Care to enlighten what he is talking about?’’

‘’Oh. Yeah,’’ Fran sighs. ‘’He lost the baby. We looked everywhere but couldn’t find her.’’

Squalo drags a hand across his face. Of course. Of fucking course Levi would lose the infant the second they left him alone with her. He should’ve seen this coming. If he wanted something done right in this household, he better do it himself.

‘’How can you lose a fucking baby?’’ 

‘’Are you sure you looked everywhere?’’ Lussuria asks, ‘’Let’s look again. We  _ have  _ to find her.’’

‘’Mammon and Levi, you’ll search the third floor,’’ Squalo demands, pointing his sword at the two. He needs someone with brain cells to go with Levi and in this case, Mammon is his best option as Squalo might kill the man if they don’t find the girl. ‘’Lussuria and Fran, you’ll come with me.’’

They head upstairs and start looking through the rooms. They check under every pillow and blanket they find for Astra. Lussuria goes as far as to look inside the washing machine - just in case. 

Fran trails behind the two men, already knowing the result of the search. They won’t find the baby, he and Levi looked everywhere for her and found nothing. 

‘’I don’t understand how she could disappear like this,’’ Lussuria sighs, placing a perfectly manicured hand on his cheek. ‘’She can’t even move on her own yet.’’

Squalo rubs his chin and shakes his head. ‘’Levi is stupid but he would’ve woken up if someone broke in to take her.’’

‘’Is it possible we hallucinated a baby?’’ Fran asks, earning a generous whack on his head from Squalo. He is about to complain about the unfairness, but the vibrating of his phone interrupts him. Fran takes the phone and checks the caller ID.

‘’It’s Senpai,’’ he says, swallowing thickly, ‘’and it’s a videocall.’’

‘’Oh shit.’’

‘’Well, answer it!’’ Lussuria urges, ‘’It’s gonna look suspicious if you ignore it.’’

And so, he presses answer.

Bel’s face takes up half of the screen and judging from the background, he is still at the hotel he stayed at and not on his mission. Fran clears his throat. 

‘’Heya, Senpai.’’

‘’What took you so long?’’ the prince demands, swirling a knife between his fingers. 

‘’Didn’t hear the phone ringing,’’ Fran lies. He glances at Squalo and Lussuria who continue the search, now running through the rooms frantically, trying to find the baby. 

‘’Whatever, I didn’t call to see you anyway,’’ Bel says, ‘’Where’s Astra? I want to see her before the mission.’’

Fran feels his body break into a cold sweat. He tugs the collar of his shirt, the fabric suddenly suffocating around his neck. Did it just get warmer in the castle or was he about to have a seizure? Fran knows he has to come up with a lie to buy them time. 

Bel can’t find out about Astra, no matter what. 

‘’She’s sleeping now,’’ he tries but as the words fall from his lips, Fran knows it takes more than that for Bel to leave him be.

‘’I don’t care, I want to see her.’’

‘’She’s with Squalo right now, I’m too lazy to move.’’

‘’ _ Fran _ .’’ 

Fran chews the insides of his cheeks. Bel using his name with that tone was  _ never _ a good sign. 

‘’Get your ass there, I want to see my daughter,’’ Bel looks genuinely pissed now. Fran was glad he wasn’t face to face with him. 

‘’Oh, yeah, absolutely,’’ Fran looks at the fellow guardians. They still haven’t found Astra. ‘’She definitely is here.’’

‘’What’s that supposed to mean?’’

‘’Nothing,’’ Fran blurts, fighting back the urge to wipe imaginary sweat from his forehead. He needs to come up with the best lie ever or else they would all be dead meat. It all depends on him. ‘’But before that, I need to tell you something.’’

On the other line, Bel groans. 

‘’Fucking get over with it then, toad.’’

Fran pauses, takes a deep breath, and speaks.

‘’I think I’m a flat earther now.’’

The corners of Bel’s mouth twitch in annoyance - he took the bait. This is good news. Bel was easy to coax into an argument over something idiotic as long as the royalty believes he was right about something.

‘’Are you now?’’ Bel’s voice trembles with irritation. The prince is smiling, but Fran knows he doesn’t find the illusionists funny one bit. ‘’And why is that?’’

‘’Well, you know, when you think about it, the horizon gives it away.’’

‘’The horizon?’’

‘’Yeah, it’s flat when you look at it, even if you look at it from a mountain,’’ Fran rambles, trying to remember what he read on a thread on Reddit a few weeks ago. ‘’Weird, right? And don’t let me get started on the water theory.’’

‘’You know what, I don’t have time to listen to all the reasons why you’re a fucking idiot,’’ Bel claims, glancing at something in the room. Possibly at the clock to see how much time he has. ‘’Just show me Astra so I can leave for the mission.’’

A shiver runs through him - it’s time to confess. He can’t keep distracting the storm guardian any longer even if Fran manages to get him to believe why the earth is flat. Fran makes eye contact with Lussuria and Squalo, both of them shaking their heads in denial. 

‘’Don’t you dare, Fran,’’ Squalo whispers. Or he thinks he is whispering, but the swordsman doesn’t know how to be quiet, so he says it at a regular volume, loud and clear for Bel to hear. 

The prince whips his head to look at Fran. ‘’What was that?’’

‘’Squalo, be quiet!’’ Lussuria slaps a hand over his mouth, causing Squalo to yelp in surprise. He tries to struggle free from Lussuria’s hold but as expected, the assassin has too much strength for him to succeed. 

‘’Lussuria, let me go!’’

‘’Toad, what is going on there?’’ 

‘’Hold that thought,’’ Fran replies, following the wrestling match before him. Lussuria was  _ not  _ someone to mess with when he was serious, it seems.

Unfortunately, Bel ran out of patience.

‘’You do know where Astra is, right?’’ Fran’s heart drops all the way to his asshole. The dreaded truth was out. Fran forces himself to face Bel and opens his mouth to reveal the truth.

‘’What the fuck are you trash yelling about?’’ Xanxus grunts, coming to the hallway from his office with the baby in his arms, sleeping soundly as she sucks on a pacifier. 

Fran could seriously cry - he gets to live another day after all.

‘’Of course I know where she is, have a little faith, Senpai,’’ Fran says and switches the camera to show the baby to Bel. ‘’As I said - she is sleeping. I can’t believe you would doubt me.’’

Seeing his daughter safe and sound in Xanxus’ arms seems to be enough to calm Bel’s nerves. The prince hangs up the call soon after making sure Astra is doing alright. 

As soon as the call ends, Fran lets out a deep sigh. He feels at least a decade older after the whole ordeal. None of the guardians react when Mammon and Levi rush downstairs, both relieved to see the kid alive and well in their boss’ arms.

Lussuria is the first one to speak.

‘’Boss, did you have her this whole time?’’ 

Xanxus nods, ‘’She seemed bored with Levi.’’

‘’You could’ve told us,’’ Lussuria whines, leaning his back against the wall. ‘’We’ve been looking for her  _ everywhere _ . We thought she was kidnapped!’’

‘’Not my fault you’re a bunch of idiots,’’ Xanxus says.

Squalo, who looks ready to fall asleep right there, suddenly snaps his head to look at Fran. ‘’But didn’t you and Levi look everywhere for her?’’

All eyes turn to the two men, expecting an explanation. Levi shrinks under the weight of their stares. 

‘’I didn’t want to bother Boss, so I skipped his office,’’ he confesses.

Squalo and Fran are quick to move, ready to end him on the spot, but Lussuria is quicker. Before they know what hit them, the sun guardian has both men pinned under him with force they haven’t experienced before. Exhausted from the search, neither of them bother to fight him off. 

The rest of the day go on without problems. Even Astra seems exhausted after the day and falls asleep without a fight early in the evening. After putting the baby to sleep, all of the guardians gather in the common room to stare blankly at the flashing television screen, not saying a word. 

Right then, right there, they make a wordless vow to never speak of the missing baby ordeal to Bel. 

It’s a secret they will take to their graves. 


	3. This is Halloween

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this update, I offer you a Halloween special. Next chapter? Who knows. Stay tuned. And as always, thank you for reading and supporting this fic, I hope you all had a fun Halloween! Until next update :)

On one late October evening, Bel sits in the common room area with Fran and Mammon, watching one of their favorite shows on television while trying to get Astra fall asleep in her bouncer. At five months old, the child showed as much of a stubborn streak as her father, refusing to give in to sleep even though her eyelids were droopy.

They usually didn’t have time to laze around but the lack of missions allowed the trio to sit still for another extra hour, flipping through the channels and finally settling on a random cartoon show which even Astra seemed to be enjoying. 

They all sit in silence until Fran breaks the spell.

"We should do that," Fran motions towards the screen with his hand, dropping some of the popcorn in his hand on the floor. Mammon glares at the younger illusionist which is enough to get him to pick the food from the floor and toss it in his mouth.

Typical.

"What, trick or treating?" Bel asks, "That stuff is for children, toad. If we went from door to door, asking for free candy in funny costumes, we'd get the police called after us."

"We have a child, though."

"No, _I_ have a child," Bel corrects, tucking said baby in better under her crown blanket, "one which you won't be using for personal gain."

"Come on. It's free candy - how can you say no to that?"

‘’Fran does have a point,’’ Mammon chimes in, ‘’and you do eat a lot of candy, Bel. We could use some extra.’’

‘’The prince does _not_ eat a lot of candy!’’

‘’Tell that to your dentist. Oh, right - you have been avoiding going for the last ten years.’’ 

Bel huffs and crosses his arms like a toddler throwing a tantrum and refuses to face the two illusionists. Mammon had hit him where it hurt. Fran wanted to bully Bel more about his fear of dentists - this new piece of information was like a special dessert you get to splurge on once in a lifetime, but he had to let it go if he wanted to get him to agree with his Halloween plans.

He clears his throat to get Bel’s attention.

‘’It’s Astra’s first Halloween also,’’ Fran says, ‘’ don’t you want to make it special and memorable for her?’’

Bel perks up at the mention of his daughter, immediately turning towards her. A fond smile spreads on his lips and grows wider when she beams back at him, nearly kicking all the air out of his lungs. Indeed, even if she wouldn’t remember the night as she grows older, they would have photos to show her and stories to tell. Bel scowls at the thought. He didn’t grow up with memories like that, especially not with his blood family. 

He wanted Astra to be able to have the childhood he never did.

‘’Fine, we can go for a short round,’’ Bel finally agrees.

‘’I’m saying this now - all costume expenses will be taken from your wallets. Don’t use Varia’s limited funds to this.’’ Fran shrinks on his seat when Mammon turns to him. ‘’We already have enough extra expenses because _someone_ had unpaid speeding tickets worth thousands of euros.’’

Bel laughs at his misery, rubbing salt to his wounds by reminding Fran of his driver’s license that is now resting at the police station. Fran flips him off, already missing the rush of adrenaline he gets whenever he speeds on a highway with one of his sportscars. He had to wait for at least thirty-five more days until he got his license back - he had a day counter app on his phone for the special day.

‘’Who is gonna drive us, though?’’ Fran asks, ‘’I don’t have my license and I’d like to see the day Senpai walks _anywhere_ if it isn’t for a mission.’’ 

He gets a well-earned smack on the head from Bel.

‘’Someone will drive you,’’ Mammon promises. Levi _did_ owe them a favor after losing to them at Mario Kart on Varia’s last game night. ‘’What you need to worry about is getting your costumes ready by Halloween - you have only a week.’’

‘’The prince doesn’t have to prepare anything - I’ll just be my royal self.’’

‘’How nice, you dress for the occasion once a year. Your delusions finally come in handy.’’

A set of knives are thrown Fran’s way, but he dodges them as if he was expecting them. Which he probably was as he got them thrown at him daily. 

‘’I’m not delusional.’’

‘’What about Astra?’’ Fran asks, ignoring the royalty. 

Bel smiles proudly, ‘’She'll dress as a princess, of course.’’

‘’A princess, huh?’’ Fran hums, nodding his head along. ''Leave it to me - I have an idea.’’

Bel did _not_ love the tone of his voice. But since it was his daughter in question, he couldn’t go too overboard with the costume.

Right?

‘’If you put her in anything ridiculous, I won’t hesitate to kill you.’’

‘’You won’t regret this.’’

For some reason, Bel believed that to be untrue.

* * *

Bel's eyes crack open as soon as he hears the footsteps approaching. He must have fallen asleep while waiting for Lussuria to dress Astra in whatever costume Fran got her. The prince rubs his eyes clear from any trace of sleep and stretches - he really could use the extra sleep. 

The first months with Astra went surprisingly well, but all that was calm before the storm. That week, Bel had had less than ten hours of sleep in the _whole week_. Needless to say, he was tired. And when prince Belphegor was tired, he was also cranky and that's when people died. 

At least he could take his frustrations out on the poor victims on his missions.

Squalo walks in, tripping on one of the pumpkin-shaped toys Lussuria had bought Astra earlier that week. Bel snorts as the swordsman curses loudly and kicks the toy away, only to get himself stuck on a spider web decoration. 

_What a fool_ , Bel thinks, shaking his head.

Having Astra around had awakened a newfound energy in Lussuria, meaning he drove all the way to the biggest shopping mall near them, bought all the Halloween decorations the store had to offer, and made the inside of the headquarters look like a haunted house. 

Not everyone was happy about the change.

‘’I don’t fucking get it,’’ Squalo says. His eyes dart around the room. The whole room was filled with ridiculous Halloween themed ornaments which stare right back at him. Some have glowing red eyes and they eerily remind Squalo of their beloved boss. ‘’Why all this trouble? It’s not like we get any trick or treaters and Astra is way too young to even understand what’s going on around her.’’

Bel shrugs - he didn’t understand how Lussuria’s mind worked and he wanted to keep it that way. 

‘’Not to mention how much money he spent on all of this,’’ Squalo continues to complain, motioning around the room wildly.

‘’You’re starting to sound like Mammon,’’ Bel points out with a teasing smile. ‘’What’s next, you’re gonna demand payment for every single favor we ask?’’

‘’Maybe I should, considering how much shit you fuckhats make me do.’’

Their bickering gets interrupted when Fran rushes downstairs, Astra in his arms. Bel beams at the sight of his daughter in a bubblegum pink gown, but the glee is soon swept away when he sees what Fran is wearing.

"I told you I wanted her to be a _real_ princess for Halloween, not a fake one," Bel snaps and takes the baby out of his arms. Fran simply adjusts his green cap and ridiculously thick fake mustache.

"She _is_ a princess," Fran says, "Princess Peach."

He tosses two pieces of clothing at Bel which the prince catches on one hand with ease. Without looking, he knows what has been tossed to him.

"And we'll be Luigi and Mario."

"Absolutely not."

"No?" Fran cocks his head. "Aw, you're gonna look pretty stupid, not being dressed up."

"The prince doesn't care."

"Everyone will think she is _my_ daughter if you don't dress up," Fran says, raising an eyebrow slightly as a challenge, "I suppose you're fine with her being mistaken as my blood relative?"

_No way in hell,_ Bel thinks as he yanks the dumb overalls on top of his pants, only putting Astra down as he wrangles the bright red shirt on. Once Astra is back in his arms, Fran tries to put the red hat on him, but Bel slaps his hand away with a huff.

"The prince won't wear the mustache or the hat."

Fran shrugs, "Suit yourself."

‘’You both look fucking ridiculous,’’ Squalo comments as he reaches for his phone and snaps a picture. Fran groans as the light from the flash hits his eyes, momentarily blinding him. Without even seeing the pic, he knows it came out unfocused with all of them blinking. 

‘’Even with this monstrosity on, the prince looks better than you ever will.’’

Before Squalo and Bel can fall into a proper argument about the claim, Fran reminds them that they have a rather fussy baby with them. If Bel and Fran wanted to get any trick or treating done tonight, they would have to get going soon.

With Levi as their designated driver, the four of them drive to the town a bit further from the headquarters. Fran never realized how haunted their castle looks to an outsider until he was looking at it from a car window with a dark grey sky behind the building.

No wonder no trick or treaters dared to walk up there - the Varia castle was straight out of a horror movie with a haunted castle.

Even though they headed out early evening, the sky started to darken with dark clouds looming in the sky, threatening but still distant. Fran had checked the forecast earlier that day - it wasn’t supposed to rain tonight, so the clouds didn’t worry him. 

Then again, Fran wasn’t exactly known for his lucky streak.

Levi parks the car in the nearest suburban neighborhood where a few groups of kids have already started their hunt for candy. As far as Fran can tell, they beat the kids in a competition for best dressed. 

‘’Make it quick, I don’t have all night,’’ Levi says and pulls out his phone. Bel untangles Astra from her car seat, holding her in his arms easily. She looks cute as ever with the princess Peach dress pulled over her pink coat and warm tights. ‘’I’ll be back to get you in two hours.’’

As they watch Levi drive off, Fran realizes he doesn’t know a single thing about trick or treating. All he knows is they knock on strangers’ doors and ask for candy. With a glance, he can tell Bel knows just as little. 

So they go with the obvious choice - follow the trail of the previous group of kids they saw.

The neighborhood looks like any regular well-off one with identical houses built after another. Every house is decorated for the spooky occasion with pumpkins and other Halloween ornaments.

They have never taken a friendly stroll around the neighborhood for obvious reasons - one being that it’s a thirty-minute drive away from the castle and the more pressing reason being their career. Assassins don’t mingle with suburban happy families.

Until now, it seems. 

They walk up to the front steps of the first house they see and ring the doorbell. A couple dressed up as gothic vampires open the door, grinning from ear to ear. Fran can tell they are one of those Halloween enthusiasts. 

‘’Give us candy,’’ Bel demands and shoves the pumpkin-shaped candy bucket towards the couple.

‘’No, you’re supposed to say trick or treat, not demand candy,’’ Fran says, forcing the prince to lower the bucket. ‘’Your lack of manners is astonishing.’’

‘’The prince doesn’t have to be polite to peasants.’’

The couple chuckles, oblivious to the clear insult aimed at them. ‘’You two are like an old married couple,’’ the taller woman coos, reaching for a candy bowl and handing out a few chocolate bars in Astra’s bucket. 

‘’We’re not a co—’’

‘’And your daughter is the most adorable thing ever!’’ the other woman chimes in, interrupting Fran. She is clearly holding back the urge to pinch Astra’s cheeks. ‘’She is the prettiest princess Peach I have seen.’’

‘’Obviously,’’ Bel claims proudly, puffing out his chest ever so slightly.

The women wish them a successful trick or treating round and close the door. As they walk towards the next house, Fran peeks inside the candy bucket where a handful of chocolate bars lay.

‘’We could’ve gotten more if you hadn’t been so rude,’’ he says, shaking his head with disappointment. 

‘’It was the first house, we’ll get more,’’ Bel reminds, ‘’that house looks promising.’’

He points towards a dark wooden house which stands out from the rest of the neighborhood like a sore thumb. Not only is it the single black house in the area but the front yard resembles a graveyard with plastic zombie dolls crawling out underneath the ground.

Decoration wise, it could compete with Lussuria’s. 

As they walk closer to the house, they notice a sign in the yard.

‘’Haunted house - only survivors get candy,’’ Fran reads out loud. No one can be seen near the house and even the kid group from earlier hurriedly walked past it without a second glance. 

‘’It doesn’t look that scary,’’ Bel comments, ‘’I say we go in.’’

Fran nods in agreement - he never found haunted houses particularly scary and the staff from every haunted house he has been into hated him for that. One place even banned him from coming again. 

‘’What about Astra?’’ 

Bel looks at his daughter who is eyeing a plastic zombie on the ground curiously. She doesn’t seem too fazed about the slaughter scene. ‘’If she gets spooked, we’ll just leave,’’ Bel says and heads towards the front door.

His fist barely touches the wooden surface before the door creaks open slowly, inviting them inside. All three of them peek inside but not much can be seen due to the darkness. The lanterns outside give enough light to see that it’s a two-story house and the decorations from outside continue on the inside as heavily.

‘’Uh, hello?’’ Fran calls in, waiting for a reply. When he doesn’t get one, the illusionist shrugs and takes the first step inside, Bel and Astra following. As soon as they are inside, the door slams shut behind them, and a hollow laugh booms above them. It’s enough to make them jerk their head upwards, only to be greeted with the sight of a zombie hand coming through the roof, reaching towards them. 

Astra babbles something in that clear voice of her and reaches her hand towards the zombie hand, trying to touch it. Bel notices her struggle and lifts her up enough for her to slap her hand against the plastic one, giggling as it falls on the floor from the impact. 

‘’I guess the quickest way would be to head straight out through the backdoor,’’ Bel says as he picks up the hand and hides it behind a skeleton lying on the floor. As soon as he takes a step towards that direction, all the doors downstairs slams shut, leaving them with only one way to go - up.

The stairs creak loudly with every step they take, making Fran cringe. He hates the sound. ‘’I wonder where all the people are,’’ he wonders, glancing at the portraits hung on the wall as they pass. ‘’It can’t just be an empty house, right?’’

‘’I guess there’ll be someone trying to jump us later. Otherwise, someone could just rob the place. It _is_ pretty impressive for a peasant’s house.’’

It’s just as dark upstairs as it was downstairs, with the difference of a few flickering lights in the narrow hall. The hall is filled with cobwebs, making it difficult to see forward. Fran grabs the web and pulls, trying to see better but as he does so, several spiders fall from above.

He jumps slightly but doesn’t scream. Fran knows they are just toys and nothing like the real deal, but that doesn’t mean it stops the hairs on his arms from standing up at the thought of real spiders crawling on him. Behind him, he hears Bel curse as he tries to fight off the fake spiders while making sure Astra doesn’t put one in her mouth. Bel kicks the spiders aside as they move forward, Fran mumbling about ‘stupid hairy demons’ under his breath.

They open a door on their left, expecting something to fall on them again, but nothing does. After waiting for a few seconds, they dare to step inside the room. 

‘’Oh, this looks like a fucking nightmare,’’ Bel comments as soon as they are inside. The room looks like a haunted nursery with an abandoned crib and bloody handprints on the walls. All the dolls have their eyes sewn shut and some have severed heads which are tossed around the floor. 

They are so focused on the creepy toys that they don’t notice the woman sitting on a rocking chair until it creaks under her. 

‘’Give back my baby,’’ the zombie woman snarls as she stands up shakily. Bel swallows thickly, holding Astra against him tighter on instinct. Whoever masked the woman did an incredible job. She takes a step closer, holding out her arm towards Astra. ‘’That is my baby.’’

Suddenly she leaps towards them at full speed. When Bel turns around to run, Fran has already made his escape out of the room. Astra lets out a delighted squeal as the woman gets closer to them and before she can wrap her bony fingers around Bel’s arm, the prince shuts the door behind him. 

‘’I hated that,’’ Bel mumbles, back pressed against the wall and heart thumping against his chest. ‘’This place sucks.’’

Fran doesn’t reply, but his face seems paler than earlier when he speaks. ‘’Let’s get the rest of this over with.’’

They look in the room closest to them which turns out to be a bathroom - also decorated but not meant as part of the tour. Bel shudders - he would never let strangers use his bathroom. 

They walk to the very end of the hallway and try the handle of a door. It opens easily. Unlike the rest of the house so far, this room is illuminated in red light. The walls are covered in black garbage bags with unsettling masks hung all over. At the very end of the room is a large, wooden box - large enough to fit in a person. 

Fran holds back the urge to roll his eyes as he approaches the wooden box.

‘’Gee, I wonder what’s in here,’’ he says in loud monotone as he yanks open the box. Sure enough, a young man dressed up as a mummy sits up, screaming to his face. Fran stares right back at him, unflinching. 

After the last room, this seems like a child’s play. 

‘’You’re supposed to scream in terror,’’ the mummy says, breaking character. He points an accusing finger at Fran, one which the illusionist swats away like a fly.

‘’And you’re supposed to be actually scary,’’ Fran replies, shaking his head as he makes his way back to Bel and Astra. The man shouts an insult after him but Fran doesn’t stay long enough to hear it.

‘’This place seemed promising when we came but now it just seems as pathetic,’’ Bel complains as they make their way downstairs. The previously closed doors have been opened again, allowing them to walk into the living room area. 

A dim light surrounds the living room just enough for them to see around. Fog shoots out from the ground and Astra giggles, trying to grasp the fog with her tiny fists while Bel struggles to hold her still, propped against his hip.

The fog makes it nearly impossible for them to see the backdoor to head out. Fran tries to search for it, but all he finds are glowing evil pumpkin and fake bloody corpses laying around with the words ‘you are next’ written on the wall with the same red liquid. 

Rather than scared, he was getting annoyed for not being let out.

‘’What is this room even supposed to be?’’ Fran asks as he picks up a giant bowl of candy from the table. It was meant for the trick or treaters but since they decided to waste his time with this lame attempt of a haunted house, he was going to take the whole thing with them.

‘’I don’t know. A horror junkyard?’’ Bel chuckles, tossing a candy in his mouth. Suddenly, the lights around them flicker once, twice, before shutting out completely. More fog surrounds them and without thinking about it, Fran backs closer to Bel and Astra, whipping his head around to spot whatever was coming their way.

‘’Senpai, behind you—’’

Bel twists his body around, suddenly facing a very real and terrifying clown running towards him and Astra. Astra lets out a cry and Bel’s body moves without a second thought - his fist makes contact with the clown’s face and judging from the satisfying crunch beneath his fingers, he landed a perfect punch.

‘’The exit is this way,’’ Fran says, pulling onto his sleeve feverishly. 

‘’You broke my nose, you fucking psycho!’’ The clown yells after them, but Bel doesn’t find the heart in him to feel guilty about it. After all, the clown was the one who upset his daughter and ran towards him looking like a nightmare. 

If anything, it was self-defense and a perfectly just reaction.

The trio rushes out of the house as fast as their legs take them, Fran still holding onto the massive bowl of candy. Astra is still crying and Bel tries to soothe her, holding her tiny frame against him while rubbing comforting circles on her back. It calms her down enough to turn the crying into tiny hiccups which eventually fade away as well.

‘’I don’t think we’re welcome in that house anymore,’’ Fran says after his breathing evens out. He straightens himself and adjusts the mustache still somehow attached to his upper lip. 

‘’You stole their candy and I broke someone’s nose. I can’t imagine why they wouldn’t want us back,’’ Sarcasm colors Bel’s voice as he speaks. He glances behind them to make sure no one is following them. ‘’Let’s head back to Levi’s car before they call the cops on us or something.’’

‘’How hilarious would it be to get arrested dressed up as Mario and Luigi though,’’ Fran says but follows him nonetheless. ‘’Imagine the mugshots. I would put that in a Christmas card.’’

‘’As hilarious as that would be, I’m not taking my daughter to jail with me before she has even turned one.’’

‘’But a haunted house is cool?’’ Fran asks, earning a slap on the back of his head, ‘’You’re dad of the year.’’

‘’Shut up toad or I’ll make you walk back at the castle.’’


	4. 'Tis the season to be jolly - part one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy birthday to Bel! I'm happy that I managed to get his done for his birthday. This chapter will actually be divided into two parts and the second part will be updated later this week, probably. Hope you're enjoying the story so far and as always, thank you for reading :)

Varia eagerly waited for the moment Astra started crawling, until the day she did. Then they realized how easy their life was before the baby could move. This new chapter in their lives raised their stress levels and made Bel even more protective than he already was - it was quite a sight to see a brutal assassin fretting over a small child, demanding for her to be watched at all times.

‘’I need the whole castle baby-proofed,’’ Bel orders, keeping an eye on Astra as she crawls towards a frog toy Fran was bribing her with, ‘’Every single corner, stair and door.’’ 

The servants scatter to different parts of the castle, doing their best to satisfy the storm guardian. They know their lives would be on the line if Astra manages to bump her head to a corner they had missed. 

Fran watches amused as the little royal struggles to make her way to him, but she is determined to get to her favorite toy. With one final push of her legs, Astra is close enough to grab the fabric of Fran’s pants and tug on it, demanding her reward. When Fran passes the frog toy to Astra, her giggles are loud and bright as she squeezes it tight in her fist. 

He looks up to Bel, who runs an exhausted hand through his hair, his blue eyes flashing momentarily under the bangs. ‘’You know, Senpai, she’s not gonna learn how to walk for a few months,’’ Fran consoles the man.

‘’No, but we need to be ready when she does because then it’ll be too late,’’ Bel replies. 

Fran stares at Astra and her blue eyes and unruly blonde hair that has started to curl from the back. Though it feels like yesterday they found her from the doorsteps, in the blink of an eye, she had gotten old enough to crawl. 

‘’Honestly, I think she is gonna skip the walking part,’’ Fran finally says, ‘’I think she is going start running right away.’’

Bel’s face pales considerably at the statement. ‘’I hope not.’’

Astra smacks Fran's knee with the toy with a determined look on her face. When she doesn’t get his attention, she lets out a high pitched squeal. Bel smiles fondly at his daughter.

"Maybe you should get her a frog hat too, to protect her head." Fran suggests, unfazed by the smacking, "But with a different animal. How about a cat?"

Bel reaches to hit him across the head. "I'm not getting her a frog hat, it looks stupid."

Fran brings a hand to his chest, expression unchanging. "Wow, Senpai. Rude."

Before they can fall into an argument, they get interrupted by Lussuria who rushes in with his expression brighter than the Christmas lights he hung all over the castle much to Varia’s dismay. 

‘’Boys, you’ll never guess what happened to me today!’’ He exclaims, tickling Astra below her chin as a greeting before sitting down on an armchair.

‘’Surprisingly enough, I also don’t really care,’’ Fran says.

‘’I think you will after I tell you," Lussuria teases, trying to awaken their curiosity. When neither beg him to tell more, Lussuria huffs in annoyance and rummages through his neon yellow fanny pack for a paper that's neatly folded in two.

Bel snatches it out of his hands, skimming through the text. "What's this?"

"I won a family vacation to Santa's town for three nights!" Lussuria announces. "They provide the housing and all I have to pay for is the flights."

"You're an orphan, Lus," Fran points out, "What're you gonna do with a family trip?"

"Stop being silly, I'll take all of you of course."

Bel lifts Astra in his arms, bouncing her slightly in a way that brings a gigantic smile on her face which Bel mirrors. "Santa's town, huh?" He says, "That could be fun."

"Right? We could have a proper festive Christmas this year!" 

Lussuria  _ did _ have a point - they never had had a proper Christmas together. Usually at least one of them had a mission during Christmas and they never were a group who were big on celebration in the first place. When Bel was younger, they had bothered to set up a tree and sometimes get gifts but all that had been left behind as they got older. No one had the energy or enough interest to bother with the winter holiday.

"That's really sentimental and all but how're you gonna get Boss and the long-haired commander to agree to this?" Fran asks in deadpan. 

Lussuria reaches to pinch his cheek with a wink and says, "If we go, none of us have to attend the annual Vongola Christmas party. Now  _ that  _ is an opportunity not even Boss can give up.’’

And so on 22nd of December, all seven members of Varia find themselves in a private jet, ready to fly them to North. It's still practically night outside when they get seated and Bel isn't fully awake yet. Since Astra had fallen back asleep as soon as they entered the plane, the exhausted parent was going to take full advantage of the situation and sleep on the plane for as long as his daughter lets him.

The only one who seemed to be buzzing with energy was Lussuria, who was excitedly reading out loud a list of things they could do together  _ as a family _ . Bel snickers to himself at the idea of getting Xanxus to wake up at the crack of dawn just to see the northern lights in the sky. It was as likely to happen as them seeing flying deer.

During the three-hour flight, Astra wakes up once but Bel pretends to be asleep, trusting that someone else will take care of her needs when they see how tired he is - and he is right. Lussuria scoops her up in his arms and rocks her back to sleep in a matter of minutes.

When Bel opens his eyes, they’re not in Italy anymore. As far as his sight carries, the ground is covered in tall piles of snow. Bel can’t remember the last time he had seen this much snow - lately, winters in Italy hadn’t been that great. The thought of being able to take Astra for a sleigh ride makes his feet tingle with excitement. 

While the rest move their belongings in a group taxi, Bel takes Astra to a nearby gas station to change her diaper much to his displeasure. He had argued with Mammon about bringing a nanny with them for the vacation because royalty shouldn’t have to change diapers, it was peasant’s labor, but Mammon had stood their ground and told Bel it would be too much extra expenses to bring along one of the nannies. And so, Bel had to change a diaper for the first time in his life and he did so with perfect success.

The car ride to the actual Santa town resort took less than an hour. When the car parked, more or less everyone was in high spirits and fully awake - even Xanxus who took in the snowy hills and activities with mild interest. 

‘’I’ll get us checked in and come back in a minute!’’ Lussuria announces before rushing towards the nearest wooden building, all of their passports in his hand. Mammon floats after the sun guardian, muttering something about trying to get them a good deal out of it. 

This gave Bel a chance to take in his surroundings properly.

All of the cottages were made out of dark wood and had a tiny porch in the front where colorful Christmas lights blinked festively. Some of the houses were smaller than others, clearly meant for couples or tiny families instead of a large group of people. A bit further from the Santa town was a ski resort which was occupied by a swarm of people even though it was only eight in the morning, not to mention it was pitch black outside. He started to understand the reason behind the festive lights.

No longer than a couple of minutes pass before Lussuria and Mammon return with three pairs of house keys and directions to their house for the next three nights. All seems to go smoothly until Lussuria reminds them they have to carry their luggage without assistance. 

‘’The prince draws the line here - I already changed a diaper today. I’m  _ not  _ carrying the luggage like some lowlife peasant,’’ he argues. The cold weather which turned Bel’s legs into literal icicles and the fragmentary sleep on the plane was enough to bring him in a sour mood, he didn’t need physical labor on top of it. On his birthday, nonetheless.

‘’You’re acting like a child, Senpai,’’ Fran comments, his words coming out slightly muffled as he buries his nose deeper in his scarf. Unlike Bel, he has his luggage in both hands, ready to carry it to their cabin. ‘’It’s not that big of a deal,  _ princess _ .’’

A maniacal grin appears on Bel’s face as he pulls out a wide set of knives from God knows where. The toad was playing with fire and he knew it, too. A family of four pass by them, stopping on their track to watch the scene unfold. ‘’Repeat that and I’ll use your intestines as tree decorations, frog face.’’

Squalo follows the two youngest of Varia bicker with uninterest, until he hears the woman nearby whisper  _ ‘’Should we call security?’’  _ to her husband.  _ Fan fucking tastic. _ They have been on this god damn resort for ten minutes at most and they are about to have security guards on their asses. Squalo drags a hand across his face - this was supposed to be a relaxing vacation.

Then again, what else did he expect from a group of assassins?

‘’VOOI! Bel!’’ Squalo roars, knocking the knives out of his hands with his sword. The knives drop to the ground and the snow swallows them whole. At the sight of a bigger weapon, the family scatters towards what Squalo suspects to be the security booth. ‘’Why the fuck did you bring so much luggage in the first place if you’re not gonna carry it?’’

‘’See? Even he thinks you’re ridiculous,’’ Fran comments, barely dodging the sword being slashed towards him. If he wasn’t already irked, Bel would’ve laughed at the younger Varia officer. Serves him right.

The prince crosses his arms and says with finality, ‘’I shouldn’t have to carry anything for two reasons. First, I’m a prince. And second, it’s my — ’’

‘’Don’t you dare to pull the birthday card, shitty prince. You’re not nine.’’

‘’It’s my birthday.’’

‘’Do I look like I give a shit?!’’ Squalo yells, pointing the sword at him. Bel turns his head away like a spoiled brat, not willing to give up. It was a matter of pride now and prince Belphegor would not go down without a fight. 

‘’Levi,’’ All heads turn to Xanxus who suddenly speaks up, despite seeming rather disinterested in the matter a minute ago. They await for what he has to say - undoubtedly Xanxus was going to bring an end to the fight. ‘’Grab the trash’s luggage and bring it with you. He already has the squirt to carry.’’

Without a single complaint, Levi lifts Bel’s bags from the ground and drag them to their cabin. Bel doesn’t bother to hide the satisfied grin on his face - the prince wins yet again.

Their next obstacle appears when they step inside the house and look around, only to find a total of three bedrooms in the entire house which means they have to  _ share _ . Varia didn’t  _ share _ . They marked their territory and fought each other to decide what belonged to who but they didn’t share.

‘’Come on, you have to compromise,’’ Lussuria begs amid the chaos, ‘’This housing was part of the deal!’’

‘’You trash can fight over the two rooms. I’ll be sleeping in one  _ alone _ ,’’ Xanxus says with finality which causes another uproar to erupt, mainly from Bel and Squalo.

‘’The prince has a baby, if anyone deserves a solo room it’s me and Astra.’’

‘’She’s a fucking baby, she doesn’t need her own bed!’’ Squalo argues, ‘’If anyone deserves their own room, it’s me after having to deal with the shit you put me through on the daily.’’

‘’No one is getting their own room,’’ Lussuria yells. All six men turn their heads to him in silence. Even Astra who had been playing with her rattle toy turns to look at the sun guardian.

‘’How about this - we play rock, paper, and scissors to decide the rooming?’’

Aside from Fran, everyone else agrees to these terms. Before they begin, Fran complains about the unfairness of the game since he had a hell ring which gave him bad luck. After a few heated rounds of rock, paper, and scissors, the rooming is decided.

Lussuria and Levi would take the only room downstairs, meanwhile Squalo, Fran and Mammon would share a room with two beds upstairs. Mammon groans in defeat when Fran scoops them in his arms, claiming them as his sleepover buddy. That leaves Bel, Astra, and Xanxus in the last and biggest bedroom. 

All roommates retreat to their rooms to unpack. Xanxus and Bel do the same, the prince following him in silence as Xanxus leads the way. Their room has two single long size beds and a small toilet with a shower. Neither of the men were used to such small beds, but they would have to do for the couple of nights they were spending there. Xanxus tosses his bag on the bed closest to the door, leaving Bel the one next to the window.

While Xanxus lies down, trying to rest before they have to move again, Bel sets Astra to rest on top of the man’s chest while he builds the portable bed for Astra. He works in silence while Xanxus entertains Astra. Judging by her giggles, she is having a blast with her godfather.

When the bed is done and ready for use, Bel falls to his back on the mattress, a wide yawn tearing his jaw. His eyelids feel heavy and the man struggles to keep his eyes open.

‘’Take a nap, trash,’’ Xanxus says suddenly. He gets up with Astra propped up on one arm and the frog toy on the other. ‘’The others will feed and play with her for few hours. I won’t give you another chance again.’’

He has been offered a gift from paradise, Bel realizes and quickly nods to the suggestion. A nap _ did _ sound tempting after all the traveling. Xanxus turns the lights off when he leaves. Sleep takes over Bel the moment he closes his eyes.

When Bel wakes up several hours later, it’s to a loud crash followed by Squalo’s screeching. He rubs his eyes in annoyance before lifting his phone to check the time - half-past three in the afternoon, though it was still almost as dark as when he closed his eyes. 

Bel stretches lazily, his shoulders cracking slightly after staying still for so long, and makes his way downstairs where the rest seem to be, judging by the volume. Before he gets to the bottom of the stairs, he catches a portion of the conversation going on.

‘’You can’t light the candles if you’re going to smash it on his face,’’ says Lussuria with a worried tone.

_ What _ was going on?

‘’Yes I can if you weren’t such a wuss about it,’’ Levi replies with a disappointed huff.

‘’You’re too slow to do it anyway, Levi.’’ Bel recognizes Fran’s voice, passive as ever. ‘’Senpai would dodge you and the cake would be ruined.’’

Bel perks up at the mention of cake and hops down the last stairs like a kid. ‘’I see you’re done with eavesdropping, Bel,’’ Mammon greets him as he comes downstairs. Bel simply chuckles, already used to being busted by Mammon whenever he tried to spy on them.

‘’Morning sleepyhead,’’ Fran says, giving the man a once over with a scrutinizing look on his face. ‘’I see the beauty sleep was ineffective. Must lose its powers as you age, huh?’’

Bel takes his knives out and sticks them on his frog hat with a thump. ‘’The prince isn’t old, toad. Watch your mouth.’’

Fran opens his mouth to disagree but Lussuria saves him from his self-destruction by sliding between the two with a cake in his hands. At the sight of his favorite treat, Bel forgets about Fran and smiles widely.

‘’Bet you thought we had nothing prepared for your birthday, scum,’’ Squalo roars with Astra in his arms, struggling to hold her still. 

In all honesty, Bel  _ had _ been in a prickly mood because he thought no one would remember his birthday with Christmas looming so close. Or worse, it’d be celebrated at the same time as Christmas. Bel would rather have his birthday forgotten entirely than settle to share it with a holiday. 

Lussuria places the cake on the counter carefully, lighting the two candles on top which spell his age - twenty-seven. ‘’Blow them out, trash,’’ Xanxus commands impatiently. Bel suspects Lussuria dragged him to attend the celebration at least until the candles were blown off. 

He takes a deep breath in and blows out the flames which flicker stubbornly before giving up and dying, leaving a swirl of smoke behind. Lussuria cheers like he is still a child and Fran blows into a party horn right next to him, the paper tube stabbing him in the ear. Bel slaps the instrument to the floor, glaring at Fran who just shrugs. 

‘’Where are my presents?’’ Bel demands, looking at his fellow guardians expectantly. The only one pulling up a gift is Fran which makes his blood run cold. Fran was a _ terrible _ gift giver. Bel would rather receive nothing at all than get anything from him.

‘’My gift is the cake,’’ Lussuria says, ‘’I spent the whole morning making it!’’

An acceptable excuse, Bel decides.

‘’My gift is giving you three days off on this trip,’’ Xanxus states and leaves upstairs to their room, already had enough of social situations for the day. Bel rolls his eyes under his bangs. Not that he expected anything from the Boss anyway. He rarely gave anyone anything and he had already let him catch up on sleep and take a break.

‘’You never accept anything from Levi and my gift for you is to stretch your deadlines on paperwork you shitstain. But they better be on my desk by next week,’’ Squalo warns but they both know it goes to deaf ears.

Bel looks at Mammon who scoffs, ‘’I won’t charge you for having to babysit your daughter.’’

So generous, his family was.

‘’I have a great gift for you, Senpai,’’ Fran speaks up with a gift bag in his hands. Bel grimaces as he gets closer, passing it to the birthday boy. 

Reluctantly, Bel takes the bag.

‘’Aren’t you gonna say thanks?’’

‘’I’m gonna see what’s inside, first,’’ Bel huffs and tears the bag open. A large box falls on the floor and Bel picks it up, inspecting his present. When the realization hits, his face drops. 

‘’You got me...a box with two hundred condoms?’’

Fran nods, too proud of himself for such a crappy gift. ‘’I thought real hard of what you could need. Then it hit me - the only thing you need is self-restraint and protection. I could only provide one of those things.’’

‘’You’re such a dick, has anyone ever told you that?’’ Bel asks in annoyance, whacking the younger Varia officer with a box filled to the brim with condoms. Astra finds it hilarious and cackles in Squalo’s arms at the scene which makes it hard for Bel to contain his smile.

Bel sets the gift aside. If he got lucky, he could ‘’accidentally’’ forget it in the cabin without Fran noticing. 

‘’Now that the gifting part is over…’’ Lussuria smiles and pushes a cake plate in front of Bel. Unable to hold himself back, Bel shoves a giant spoonful of strawberry cake in his mouth, trying not to moan as the flavors caress his tastebuds. Lussuria has done it again.

‘’Do you like it?’’ the sun guardian asks, giving slices to the rest of the Varia. He takes Astra from Squalo so the swordsman can eat in peace as Astra tries to steal some cake with every opportunity given to her. 

‘’Yeah,’’ Bel manages to reply while devouring the sugary bliss in front of him. Everything was just like he preferred.

It wasn’t a terrible birthday at all, he supposes.

Later that night after Bel puts Astra to sleep, they all gather in the living room and light up the fancy fireplace, letting the flames be the only source of light in the room. It was an odd sight to have all of them sitting around in their pajamas and Lussuria’s handmade wool socks. Bel doesn’t remember the last time it had been this peaceful when they were gathered together.

‘’There’s a reason why I wanted all of you here at the same time,’’ Lussuria says, setting his drink on the dark coffee table. ‘’I have an idea.’’

‘’Haven’t you had enough ideas already?’’ Squalo groans, leaning back on the rocking chair he was sitting on. He looked like a total grandpa with his silver hair and matching checkered pajama set. 

Lussuria glares at him and Squalo falls silent. Sometimes Bel believes he has almost as much authority as Xanxus does which alone is quite impressive. ‘’Let’s do a secret Santa this year,’’ Lussuria suggests, looking at each of the guardians as if he was trying to hype them up. ‘’It’s gonna make the whole gift process a lot easier.’’

‘’Here’s an idea to make it even easier - let’s not buy gifts,’’ Fran says from the other end of the couch. 

‘’No, we  _ have _ to buy gifts. We’re on the land of Santa, for goodness sake!’’ Lussuria argues, ‘’We would disgrace Christmas if we didn’t even get gifts while we’re here.’’

Lussuria wasn’t going to take a no for an answer as he pulls out an elf hat next to his armchair, holding it towards them expectantly. ‘’Go on, pull out a name and that will be the person you get a gift for. Hurry up!’’

Fran is the first one to get up and pull out a name. The corners of his mouth tug up slightly as he reads the name on his piece of paper before shoving it into, his pocket and walking away. Bel has never been religious but he sends a wish that his name wasn’t on that piece of paper - he already got one horrible gift from Fran, he didn’t want another one. The rest of the guardians follow his lead and pull out a name one by one until there is only one name left which Xanxus takes without giving it a second glance. 

Bel studies the name in his paper, smiling victoriously - he already knew what he was getting for his secret Santa. This was going to be easy peasy.


	5. 'Tis the season to be jolly - part two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...part two took a lot longer to finish than I expected, lol. I hope you enjoy this chapter and don't forget to leave a comment if you did!

For the first time in weeks, Astra sleeps throughout the night without waking up once. For that, Bel is thankful. The storm guardian was unsure how Xanxus might react if Astra woke him up with her crying in the middle of the night. Fortunately, he didn’t have to find out.

Bel peeks inside the bed where Astra is sound asleep and tucks her in better before closing the door behind him softly as he heads downstairs. He was generous enough to let her and the boss sleep a bit longer. The smell of freshly brewed coffee hits his nose as Bel reaches the kitchen area, Squalo, Mammon, and Fran all seated around the kitchen table. 

‘’Oh, you’re up already,’’ Mammon hums when they notice Bel, ‘’that’s unusual.’’ 

‘’Slept a lot yesterday,’’ Bel reminds as he pours himself coffee, sweetening his drink with sugar and cream. He takes a seat next to Mammon, kicking Fran’s shin under the table. ‘’What’re you reading?’’

Fran doesn’t even flinch, only slides a template to the other side of the table for the man to see himself. ‘’Checking out the ski resort flyer,’’ the illusionist says with a glint in his eyes, ‘’I want to try some activities while we’re here.’’

Bel sips on his coffee and eyes through the flyer. They offered not only skis but also snowboards the customers could rent and use. He takes a mental note of the possibility take Astra on a sleigh ride, pulled by a  _ real  _ reindeer. Though Astra was just a baby, she had already picked up the thrill of going fast and trying new things. Bel knew she would love the little activity and he just might be in a good enough mood to risk freezing his legs. 

‘’Do you even know how to ski?’’ He asks as he slides the flyer back to Fran.

‘’I’m going to snowboard,’’ Fran replies, ‘’It can’t be that hard.’’

‘’Slide down the highest hill and I’ll give you ten euros,’’ Bel jokes, shaking his head slightly. There was no way that idiot could learn how to snowboard in one day, let alone be ballsy enough to try the expert hill. Bel had seen the hill himself and even he wouldn’t have dared to go for it on his first try. 

Fran doesn’t reply, only stares at the flyer with an odd look in his eyes.

‘’Lussuria and I are gonna kick back and relax in the sauna today,’’ Squalo announces, rolling his tense shoulders until they stop cracking from the movement, ‘’then he wants to visit the fucking gift shops for his secret Santa.’’ 

‘’I read you’ll have a chance to try ice swimming here. Why not give that a go, captain?’’

‘’Why would I want to voluntarily freeze my balls off?’’

‘’Ohh, I see,’’ Fran hums. He turns to look directly at Squalo, a challenge flashing in his teal eyes. ‘’You’re too much of a coward to try. Bummer.’’

‘’VOOI! Who’re you calling a coward?’’ Squalo yells loud enough to wake up Astra upstairs. When she begins to wail, Bel rushes upstairs, shooting daggers at the two assassins for waking her up. ‘’I’ll fucking do it, runt!’’

Mammon sighs, shaking their head at the obvious bait Squalo took. They would’ve felt bad if Fran hadn’t laid out such an obvious trap for the man. This was all on Squalo and he deserves to jump in the frozen lake for being stupid enough to get riled up by Fran.

* * *

A violent shiver runs through Bel’s body as the chilling north wind breezes through him. Turns out wearing skinny jeans and a fashionable but not very warm winter jacket wasn’t enough to keep the cold away here. In Italy, this would’ve been enough to keep him somewhat warm, but now he was  _ freezing _ . 

Although Bel could barely feel his legs anymore, the prince adjusts Astra in his arms and searches for the woman who arranges the sleigh rides. He was determined to do this with her even if it meant he had to freeze his ass off for it. 

Prince Belphegor would  _ not  _ leave this place until he got what he wanted.

‘’What exactly are we looking for here, trash?’’ Xanxus asks, burying his nose deeper into his scarf. His breath makes puffs of clouds in the air as he exhales. ‘’Let’s get this over with so I can leave. It’s fucking freezing out here.’’

‘’The prince wants to go on a sleigh ride,’’ Bel informs the boss, pointing towards a spot on their left where a woman with a deer was getting the animal ready for its job. A grin spreads on his lips - Bel had found what he was looking for. ‘’Wanna join us?’’

Xanxus weighs his options - should he go inside the ski resort café where he could be warm and toasty and wait for the rest of Varia stumble inside after they were done with whatever activities they were up to or should he go with Bel and Astra to kill some time despite the cold weather? He makes the mistake of making eye contact with Astra who beams at her godfather, tugging on his heartstrings. 

Xanxus could say no to Bel but he didn’t possess the power to decline the brat.

‘’Guess so,’’ he grouches, burying his hands in his pockets as they make their way towards their destination. The woman smiles at them, explaining the route they would take and the cost for the fun. Bel slips her the money and sits down in the sleigh, Xanxus taking a seat next to him.

The woman offers them a blanket to keep their legs warm which Bel is about to decline when Xanxus grabs it and lays it on top of all three, claiming he didn’t want Astra to freeze. Bel believes this to be only partly true - he was certain Xanxus had noticed the way his legs were shaking from the cold.

The sleigh begins to move, snow crunching under it as the reindeer pull them towards a trail in the woods, one which it has undoubtedly taken many times before. Bel is glad he decided to wait until it was light out - the scenery before them was breathtaking. They were surrounded by tall trees, the branches coated with snow. The sunlight hit the snowflakes in a way that made it seem as if it was glitter instead of snow. Bel had never seen such a thing before.

The pace was slower than Bel expected which gives him a chance to dig out his phone, flip the front camera on and call Xanxus’ name on time to snap a selfie of all three of them looking in the camera. Both Bel and Astra are wearing identical smiles, though one of them has no teeth and Xanxus is wearing a blank expression. Bel takes this as a win - at least he wasn’t frowning like in most pics. Bel sends it to their group chat and slips the phone back into his pocket so he could enjoy the rest of the ride.

The ride lasts about twenty minutes in total, which is enough time to lull Astra to sleep, making it difficult for Bel to get up from the sleigh when they were finished. The last thing he wanted to do was to wake her up with his movements. 

‘’Let’s go wait for the rest in the café,’’ Xanxus suggests, eager to get away from the crowd in the ski resort - the place was  _ packed _ , not just with adults but with screaming and crying children as well. All the noise was giving him a major headache and if he didn’t get somewhere less bustling, then God help him.

‘’Wait,’’ Bel urges, grabbing onto his sleeve before Xanxus can walk away. With his free hand Bel points towards the lift taking people up on the hill. There, standing in line with a snowboard was Fran. 

When the mist guardian spots them, he lifts his hand slightly and yells, ‘’You’re about to owe me ten euros, fake prince.’’

Bel shakes his head and snickers - this could only end in a disaster. 

‘’The prince wants to see the frog fall on his face.’’

As the lift takes Fran up to the highest hill, Bel digs out his phone, ready to record what he hopes to be a hilarious failure video. He’d never let him live this down. Less interested in the current events, Xanxus takes a seat in one of the wooden park benches, crossing his arms. Hopefully, the trash would be over with it soon so that they can head inside and he could feel his legs again.

Fran wastes no time prepping himself for the fall. Instead, as soon as his board touches the snowy ground, the man takes off with more speed than is probably safe. He nearly bumps into one person, who yells something unintelligible to him - Bel can only assume it wasn’t anything encouraging. 

‘’He’s insane,’’ Bel says as the man heads towards a ramp despite his snowboarding skills being shaky at best. He is no longer looking at his phone screen when Fran slides up in the air for what feels like several meters before he lands. He tries to slow down the fall by stretching out his arm, but it doesn’t stop him from rolling down the hill.

Xanxus’ eyes widen slightly as he watches his mist roll down with his snowboard like a snowball until he lands on his back with a thud.

‘’Oh shit,’’ Xanxus states before they hurry towards Fran, who has gained quite an audience with his stunt. Xanxus pushes the strangers away, telling them to scatter away. Bel is eyeing his partner curiously, looking for any twisted limbs.

‘’My right-hand hurts,’’ Fran mumbles, trying not to show how much in pain he is. To anyone else, it might seem like he is calm and unharmed but Xanxus recognizes the widened eyes and the way he is biting on his lower lip.

Xanxus yanks his mitten off and Bel takes a sharp intake at the sight of his swollen wrist.

_ Not good. _

‘’Yeah, no shit, you have a broken wrist,’’ Xanxus huffs and helps him up, careful not to touch the injured arm. ‘’You won’t be doing shit with that hand of yours in a while.’’ Fran groans slightly but doesn’t complain when Xanxus takes him to the infirmary to get his injury properly checked out. 

Bel stares at their retreating backs and shrugs - he wasn’t a fan of doctors of any kind, so he’d rather stay out of the situation. Besides, judging by the way his wrist looked like a tennis ball, Fran most likely had to get surgery on his arm. Bel didn’t care to stay by his side through that - Xanxus would be more than enough of moral support. 

Instead, he looks at Astra, who has somehow managed to stay asleep despite all the hassle. For the first time during this trip, Bel was alone with nothing to do. 

The prince decides to walk in the first cabin he sees, kicking the snow off his shoes as he enters a cozy gift shop. The warmth of the cottage embraces him in a welcoming hug, pulling him inside as Bel looks around curiously. Different handmade crafts hang from the wall and take up all space from the display tables. The items vary from scarves to teddy bears and wooden utensils. Bel reaches for a crocheted reindeer with a bell tied around its neck with a red ribbon. 

He  _ knew  _ Astra already had a million stuffed toys but she didn’t have a reindeer one - surely she wanted a souvenir to remember their trip by? Bel tosses the toy in a handmade basket, deciding to get his secret Santa gift over with as well.

The woman behind the counter smiles at him as he walks around the shop, lifting all the items for further inspection before deciding it wasn’t good enough and setting them back down. She wanted to offer him help, but didn’t want to speak in case she woke up the sleeping baby in Bel’s arms.

Bel ends up walking through the shop three times before deciding on a gift, setting it and the reindeer on the counter, and asking for the woman to put them in gift bags. With the presents out of the way, he can kick back and enjoy the rest of his holiday stress-free.

* * *

Fran’s wrist had been broken, just as Xanxus and Bel assumed. Xanxus was able to return to the cabin by dinner time whereas Fran was stuck at the hospital until the next morning - the doctors insisted for him to get surgery on the broken wrist and get a cast, otherwise it would heal crooked. The boss was in a visibly terrible mood and retreated to Bel and his room as soon as had eaten.

Needless to say, Xanxus was not the one to pick up Fran from the hospital the next day and the man sent Levi to get the youngest of Varia back to the cabin.

"This blows," Fran complains in monotone, raising his arm to study his brand new teal cast. "I'm not even allowed to go snowboarding again. I actually enjoyed it until I broke my wrist."

Bel laughs as he bounces Astra on his lap. The girl giggles in delight, throwing her arms up in the air as if to demand for him to go higher. "Think positively," he says, "you got ten euros out of it."

"That's nothing compared to the hospital bill we got," Mammon points out. They give the younger illusionist a nasty glare as they pass with a cup of hot cocoa in their hands.

"If he let Lussuria heal the wrist, he wouldn’t have needed surgery in the first place," Bel points out, holding his daughter back as she tries to reach for the sweet drink. 

"And risk looking as ugly as Levi? No thank you, I'd rather pay the bill."

They hear Levi yell an annoyed "hey" from the kitchen where he is helping Lussuria prepare dinner. Bel had no idea where the man managed to find ingredients to prepare a Christmas meal for them but as long as he would get fed, he didn't care.

Before Fran got back, Squalo had gone and gotten them a real Christmas tree outside which Bel and Mammon had decorated together even though Mammon complained the entire time about the extra cost of the ornaments. Bel, on the other hand, was thrilled. There was nothing the prince loved more than impulsive shopping and reckless spending.

Underneath the now decorated tree sat their secret Santa gifts with a few extra ones meant for Astra. Despite being an adult, Bel was itching to rip open his gift and find out what he had gotten and from  _ who _ .

Astra squirms on his lap which Bel knows to mean she has had enough lap time and needed exploring time instead. He complies with her wishes and sets her down on her stomach. Immediately she begins to crawl towards the presents at a slow pace, eyes gleaming with curiosity. All those different colors and beautiful ribbons were an irresistible lure for a baby like her.

‘’Change of plans, we are doing secret Santa now,’’ Bel informs, grabbing a gift bag meant for Astra as he brings his daughter back to the couch much to her displeasure. Much like her father, Astra doesn’t like being denied to do as she pleases. She bursts into tears as soon as Bel lifts her from the floor and doesn’t calm down until Bel shows the white bag with pink glitter snowflakes to her.

‘’Already?’’ Lussuria asks, drying his hands on an apron. ‘’But the plan was to wait until after dinner.’’

‘’Astra is getting fussy, we are doing it now. Get your asses here.’’

While the rest of Varia gather in the common room with their presents in hand, Bel lets Astra open her present already. She pulls out the reindeer plushie out of the bag, smiling wide as the bell around its neck makes a happy jingle. As long as the toy was able to keep her entertained, Bel would have nothing to worry about.

‘’Boss you should go first,’’ Lussuria urges, not even trying to hide his curiosity. Xanxus had never been a gift giver but much to everyone’s surprise, the man had a square wrapped present in his hands. ‘’Who was your secret Santa?’’

Instead of giving a name, Xanxus tosses the present to Fran who struggles to catch the flying object with one hand. The present falls on his lap and Fran stares at it while the others stare at him.

‘’Open it already, the prince wants to see.’’

Fran looks at Bel with a blank face, ‘’I can’t open it, I only have one hand to use.’’

Squalo takes the present from his lap and tears it open rather ungracefully. Bel stretches his neck to see what the illusionist got and laughs when he spots the book in his hands.

‘’A fool’s guide to snowboarding,’’ Fran reads out loud in deadpan. ‘’Gee, thanks, Boss. Appreciate it.’’

It’s only for a second but Bel catches a glimpse of a playful grin on the man’s lips before Xanxus turns his head away to hide his amusement. 

‘’Well then, guess it’s my turn now,’’ Fran says and hands Squalo a large gift bag. ‘’Merry Christmas long-haired captain.’’

A relieved sigh escapes between Bel’s lips. He was safe from the toad’s terrible presents. 

Like Fran’s gift, Squalo tears the whole bag open, causing the insides to fall at his feet. The contents make Levi to burst into a laughing fit while Squalo picks them up, visibly enraged by the gift. 

‘’Did you get me fucking adult diapers, trash?!’’

‘’And peanuts. Oh, there’s bandages and bandaids in there as well.’’

‘’Why the fuck would you get me this shit?’’

‘’The adult diapers were part of the plan but the rest I stole from the hospital,’’ Fran shrugs. ‘’I ran out of time to get a present because, well, I was having  _ surgery _ on my wrist.’’

‘’That doesn’t explain shit!’’ Squalo yells, tossing his present away. He looks like he is seconds away from murdering Fran, which Bel wouldn’t be opposed to at all. If anything, it’d spice up their Christmas a little bit.

The presents take a turn to normal ones when Squalo hands Levi a thick, scientific book on something the man was into. Bel didn’t care nor remember what it was about, but it seemed to make Levi overjoyed. Levi’s secret Santa was Xanxus and the lightning guardian had gotten him an expensive bottle of whiskey and a gift card to an expensive five-star steakhouse. Xanxus opened the bottle of whiskey right away and poured himself a glass. Levi nearly cried when no complaint was made.

‘’Who got the prince as secret Santa?’’ Bel asks impatiently, ‘’I want my present already.’’

Mammon sighs, picks up their neatly wrapped present, and brings it to Bel who snatches it out of their hands. Mammon advises him to be careful with it, but the prince is already ripping open the wrapping paper. 

‘’What is it?’’ Bel asks, turning the porcelain item in his hands.

‘’A piggy bank,’’ Mammon replies, ‘’you have a baby now, better start saving some money. Especially with your spending habits, Bel.’’

Bel scowls at his gift - the prince was plenty smart with his finances, no matter what Mammon might think. He turns the piggy bank to face him. Perhaps he could use it later in life with Astra to give her allowance. Not that she was going to need it - she was a princess after all.

‘’The prince was obviously the only one to put any effort in this,’’ Bel says as he hands out his gift to Lussuria. The sun guardian smiles at him, muttering a quick thanks before carefully opening the packaging. Bel watches as Lussuria pulls out handmade mittens and a long, neon pink scarf. 

Lussuria snaps his head to stare at Bel, who simply shrugs and says, ‘’You’re always knitting us things but never for yourself.’’ 

‘’I didn’t know you have a heart, Senpai,’’ Fran mocks as Lussuria lunges forward in an attempt to hug Bel, but he dodges the man and orders him to stay away from him. Lussuria obeys, though not without pursing his lips in disappointment. 

‘’I guess that leaves my gift for last,’’ Lussuria says, clapping his hands together. Mammon perks up when they are handed a white envelope, filled with cash. 

Mammon smiles, ‘’You couldn’t have gotten me a better present, Lussuria.’’

The group falls into a mundane chatter, comparing and going through the gifts they got and trying to decide who gave the best and worst ones. For a little bit Bel watches it all in silence, a strange feeling rising in his chest. It’s funny how the same people who practically raised him were now helping him raise his daughter - even though Bel would never admit having any parental figure in his life. Or needing help for that matter.

Then, the moment passes as Lussuria decides it’s time for dinner and the group of assassins scatter from the common room towards the table filled with one delicious dish after another.

It’s not a bad Christmas at all, Bel decides with a small smile playing on his lips.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was never supposed to see the light of day but then I decided that this world needs more Varia family fluff, especially of Dad!Bel. Please do leave a kudos and comment if you enjoy the fic and let me know what you think! Thank you for reading.


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